Thursday, November 27, 2008
Laukku Cukup Masin
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Nak Kahwin ke Tak?
Kelakar lah kawan aku yg sorang ni. Tarikh kahwin dah nak dekat, dia jadik nervous pulak. She asked me to give 3 reasons why she should proceed with the marriage plan. Sebagai seorang yg berpengalaman berkahwin selama hampir 6 tahun, dan telah mengalami beberapa ujian berumahtangga, aku pun bagi lah 3 sebab yg aku rasa boleh meyakinkan dia untuk teruskan niat mendirikan masjid. Dalam Islam pon dah nyatakan byk sebab yg bagus2, tapi aku bagi dia 3 sebab yg berdasarkan perjalanan hidup aku sendiri.
3 sebab itu ialah:
1. Untuk dapat lebih byk pahala - setiap perbuatan yg menyenangkan hati suami, insya Allah akan dpt reward dari Allah. Hati pun senang. Kalau ditimpa ujian/kesusahan, anggaplah itu utk menguji keimanan. Suami hanya lah pengantara (medium for the test). This is my key to remain positive and motivated for my marriage.
2. As your companion - this should last till eternity, should he choose to remain loyal and good husband to you till the end. Again, there will be hilly adventures along the way, but at the end of the day, if all ends well, deep down in your heart you'll know that Allah created him to be your companion, the one to complete you (that's why I like Jerry Maguire - "You Complete Me").
3. It'll definitely expand you as an individual. There will be more challenges - emotional, physical, spiritual - with many parties - hubby, your own family, your in-laws, etc. You'll learn how to cope with all these challenges as time passes by. You will surely grow bigger as a person.
Aku rasa sebab2 di atas adalah sangat tinggi nilainya (korang nak kutuk, kutuklah :P). Aku pon tak sangka yg aku boleh bagi sebab2 yg sangat munasabah berdasarkan pengalaman hidup aku sendiri. Phuyoooo…Dan dengan sebab2 di atas, kawan aku yakin yg dia telah membuat keputusan yg selayaknya, Alhamdulillah…
Lagi satu kisah plak. Ada sorang kawan aku yg masih single mid 30’s, kesian dia. Hajat di hati nak kahwin, tapi hampir semua pompuan yg telah berkahwin nasihatkan dia tak payah la pening2kan kepala nak kahwin ni…buat nyusah jer, lelaki byk sgt yg hampeh sekarang..nak dapatkan yg criteria dia suka (alim, muka baik, memang baik – amat payah sekali…). So drpd kahwin dan pening, lebih baik tak kahwin dan tak pening..begitulah adanya cerita dia..keadaan yg amat menyedihkan..namun dia masih mencarik…dan mencarik…dan lagi..dan lagi…
Marriage indeed is a gamble. Nasib nasib beb. Untung sabut timbul, untung batu tenggelam. Dua-dua untung, tapi satu timbul, satu tenggelam. Terpulanglah pada kepimpinan nakhoda kapal dan anak kapal yg taat perintah dan supportive. Lanun pun dah semakin byk, nakhoda senang sangat nak hilang fokus. Tak payah nak ke Teluk Aden Somalia, kat ofis pon dah berlambak. Cuma kena pandai identify ler.
Apa-apa hal, go back to basics of Islam. Kenapa kita digalakkan berkahwin? Apa tujuan perkahwinan? Kenapa cerai itu perkara halal yg paling dibenci Allah? Kenapa Allah benarkan poligami walaupon ianya paling dibenci isteri (rasa mcm nak tikam jer kot, tak pon “potong” the enabler…heh…heh…). Semuanya ada sebab dan hikmah yg tersembunyi. Kadangkala tak tercapai akalmu…
Senang cerita, kalau ada lagik lepas ni orang bujang/anak dara tanya aku nak kahwin ke tak, aku kata “Go on”. Kahwinlah. Cuma aku nak bagi peringatan sikit. Ujian Allah yg paling hebat adalah ujian dalam bentuk kasih sayang, melalui insan yg kita paling sayang (dah berapa banyak entry blog aku cerita ceriti pasal mende ni lah…) . Memang teramat perit dan tak terperi sakitnya. Sakit yg org lain tak nampak. Dia kes makan dalam...Kalau kita boleh lepas ujian ni with flying colors (mcm Nabi Ibrahim sanggup korbankan Nasi Ismail), alamatnya ujian2 lain mcm kacang putih jer you…itu belum masuk lagik bab kekasih lama carik you semula…hai…lagik pening…camne nak jadik seorang isteri/suami yg setia selamanya…payah tu…kekasih gelap vs. kekasih terang dan halal…huhuhu…
Pendek cerita, kalau tak mahu dilambung ombak, jgn berumah di tepi pantai.
So, nak kahwin ke tak?
Saturday, November 22, 2008
First Taste of Academic Success - Husna Eka
During the hiatus period of staying at home, she went crazy watching Cartoon Network, Nickelodeon and Disney Playhouse all day. The parents were then thinking heck, we need to fill up her time. After talking to a few fellow parents from the Vital Years class, most of them send their kids to Nuri to pursue the kid's education building program. Alas, we had found the nearest Nuri and decided to pursue hers at the center. Link - www.nuri.com.my
Husna started a month late from the rest, she's the 14th student in that J4 Pre-school class for 4 year olds. The teachers like her since she is easier to teach and listen well (yeah, after spending 1 year at Vital Years, that should be great foundation for her).
During the mid-year review, she fared very well, as per my post entitled "Pioneer Achievement - Husna Eka". Then last 2 weeks, it was time to take her results for that final year review.
We had to attend a ceremony for the award, but we were late. So we told Husna to get the award again for the upcoming years.
Pix - Husna poses with lil sis Huda.
Friday, November 21, 2008
Hated Songs and "Tercipta Untukku"
- Bila Nak Saksi - Spider
- Ku Merindu - Ella feat. Shah
- She Will Be Loved - Maroon 5
- I will Always Love You - Whitney Houston
- Big Girls Don't Cry - Fergie
- All songs by Guns N Roses, especially Don't Cry (I used to like this song when I was at courting stage with my ex way back in 1992..whoaaaa...). But now, sorry.
- Oh, and all songs by Anuar Zain, especially Lelaki Ini (bila dengar rasa mcm nak hempas jer radio tu)
Wow, what a bummer. I guess there are flames undistinguishable hidden somewhere in this universe, were invisible all these years until it could not be hidden anymore and eventually succumbed to pressure of life. So what should I do? Sigh...if only....but then again, only Allah knows what is best for each of His creation.
That Virtue Called Gratitude/Thankfulness
We had our meal at the restaurant. Seating next table to us was a family of 6 - parents plus 4 kids. My guess the 2 big brothers were around 6 & 8, with a toddler sister around 4 and another tot maybe 1 year plus who was on the mother's lap all the time. The father was clad in a worn out t-shirt and pants while the mom was in quite worn out baju kurung. The father only ordered 3 meals. Despite feeling that it's not enough, the 2 brothers' happiness and excitement was appalling but the parents did not share such exhilirating experience as their kids. It showed.
We were eating almost at the same time. While my kids were busy eating, eyeing for the play room section and their Happy Meals toy and that add on Madagascar headgears, I heard the father scolded his kids with warnings that went like this:
"Hah makan puas-puas. Ini makan sesekali jer. Satu tahun satu kali pun belum tentu".
Gosh....what a pity. I saw the kids especially the 2 eldest ones were practically licking the burger cover, sucking the chicken's bones and snooping at every little left overs on the table. Their faces of contentment were obviously not a good signal for the father. Maybe he felt guilty that his kids enjoyed the meal so much and wanted to come again soon, but he just couldn't afford such luxury.
Has it ever occur to you that eating at McDonalds is a luxury? Apparently not for majority of us. Perhaps eating at hotel's restaurants is considered a luxury to us. But to these people, eating at hotels is probably never exist in their chapter of life. McDonalds meals is a luxury. Once a year eh? Think of that....
A reminder to me:
It is God who has made the night for you, that you may rest therein, and the day, as that which helps you to see. Verily God is full of grace and bounty to men, yet most men give no thanks.
It is God who has made for you the earth as a resting place, and the sky as a canopy, and has given you shape--and made your shapes beautiful--and has provided for you sustenance of things pure and good; such is God, your Lord. So glory to God, the Lord of the worlds! Qur'an 40.61, 64
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Why So Many?
I've got so many things to tell...sometimes I wonder when I see postings of others with title like "Aku takde idea tapi nak tulis jugak" or "Apa-apa je lah"...Why I've got this so many many things to write about but could not find the time to write? I've even listed down a few more topics to write about which will be coming up soon.....
Sigh......is this what people called Escapism?
Know Your Rights, People
Chronology of events:
8.05 am- In the car, looking at my watch. Shoot! It's already passed the 8.00 am barrier. RED.
8.10 am - Stopped by McD drive thru, placed order, confirmed order.
8.15 am - Still waitin' in the car for my order.
8.16. 8.17, 8.18, 8.19 am - I was alternately looking at my watch and counting the seconds of how slow the service was.
8.20 am - The cashier gave me the WRONG order, meant for the car behind me.
8.21 am - Got my correct order. Said thank you, smiled and rushed off to work.
9.00 am - Visited http://www.mcdonalds.com.my/ and dropped by a comment at their "Just Tell Us" section. I really poured my heart out at that kind of service which leaves much to be desired. Key comments:
- Slow
- Not efficient in taking order
- Wrong info given for the "Move It" breakfast meal
- Insufficient info for the pricing structure
- Not well trained staff (err, I saw 4 staff at the counter but know nuts what they were doing!)
Reminder : Customer is always right. Never let your rights be squashed by the sellers/service providers.
Goodness Gracious Mr. Pitt!
The result:
Almost all men who passed by my cubicle would have a glance at it, maybe wishing "Oh my, what if.....".
But there are always the daring ones, who just could not hold back their curiosity. Everyday I've got the same question from this not-so-complicated species, that goes like this (I quote verbatim):
It was damn funny. I posted it 3 days ago, and until today I just could not take it any longer. A guy stopped by and asked, to which I responded:
Maybe I should create a competition. What is the best answer should there be more men who'd ask the same question.
The Word "Mangkuk" & "Mangkuk Tingkat" Business
The idea of the business was mooted by a common guy turned philantrophist from Yayasan Nurul Hikmah - to help people to fish, and not by giving them the fish. It is to help single mothers.
This is what the business does:
- Get application from single mothers (ibu tunggal/ibu tinggal) or wanna be housewives.
- These mothers are to do their normal cooking at home, and if they feel like making extra money by cooking, they can cook extra portion for people to subscribe to their cooking.
- But before they can start the business, they have to attend a course on cooking the right way and get certified by the Islamic Manufacturing Practices.
- Once in a while, they will be audited (spot check done). Their kitchens have to be cleaned and no MSG to be added in their dishes. If found guilty, that's it - license to cook suspended.
What do they truly sell?
Food which is prepared at home, with the intention to serve the family, not for making profit. Somehow they believe that the intention in cooking will affect the quality of the food and ultimately, satisfy the eater with a different aura of fulfilment. Get the idea?
How to order?Working men and women can place their order online, and the lunch will be delivered in tiffin carrier to your office and hence the name "mangkuk tingkat" originates.
Price
Order is for one month (block order) and the booking window is only 1 week before the month starts. For price range of RM4-6, you can get great deal of rice, 1 main dish and 1 vege dish. Very affordable and easy.
The fun part
Starting off his speech, the creative guy who created this business showed a slide on types of mangkuk tingkat - those were the 2 tiers, 3 tiers and 4 tiers. So he said:
"Makanlah kamu dari 2, 3 atau 4. Kalau tak mampu, maka 1 sahaja". Much to the delight of the audience.
The dishes are served in 4 tiers mangkuk tingkat, but only 3 tiers will be filled. The top tier is called "tingkat kasih" and it is supposed to remain empty (since it is up to the cook to put in something extra, like fruits for example).
I strongly recommend that you visit this very interesting business's website - http://www.mangkuktingkat.com/ to find out more and try it if the cook is available near your working place.
During the Q&A session, there was a senior citizen who commented that the guy should really consider to change the name of the business. Apparently, the word "mangkuk" is not a good word in the Japanese language. Yup, I did check with a Japanese speaking guy, it is a vulgar word.
But for us Malaysians, we use the word "mangkuk" to swear at people, without knowing what it means in other language. Have fun searching for the meaning!
There was also a question by a lady that goes like this,
"If let say the eater really like the cooking, and wish to get to know the cook in person, have there been cases where the eater fall in love with the cook?"
Yeah, she's damn worried to subscribe it for her hubby. Just in case.
The creator responded:
"The customers will never know the cook. The cook will always remain anonymous. But there are cases where the delighted customer send flowers to my office, to be passed on to the cook".
You see ladies, it is true. The way to get to a man's heart is thru his stomach. :P No matter how busy you are, try to squeeze sometime to do some simple cooking for the family.
Conclusion - Food that binds the stomach, binds the family.
Monday, November 17, 2008
Songs of the Week
2. Tercipta Untukku - Ungu
3. Kenangan Terindah - Samsons
4. Dibius Cinta - Melly Goeslow feat. Yusry KRU
When people are in love, they like to dedicate beautiful songs to their lover. It could be on the ground of the music, beat, but most of all, it's because of the lyrics. Sometimes we want to tell others how we feel, and the best way to tell that is via songs. Beautiful feelings via beautiful songs.
But what happen after they get married? Somehow this little gesture called "songs dedication" would die off naturally. Why? Is it wrong or weird that a person were to dedicate songs to the wife/husband? Somehow in our community, I guess it's just not natural to do it after the holy matrimony. Why? What's the root cause of all this?
Among little gestures to let the fire burning in a relationship is to dedicate songs to your partner. I strongly believe that by doing this, all the heartache, bad memories, regrets, could be lessned if not wiped out totally from one's heart.
Thursday, November 13, 2008
My Alma Mater : Where Are Thou?
Kajang (Selangor)
But whaddaya know?? Kajang has CHANGED A LOT!!! I could not find the road leading to my alma mater. What used to be 2-lane roads are now hustling bustling hiways all over the place! Where on earth is my old high school?? Tried the junction with SAAS school as the landmark, we drove in only to find out it was a brand new primary school for a new taman. Asked for direction from the school security, but still, it was no where near our sight.
Since it was already late for our journey home, I decided to put my friends at ease and told them that it's better that we head home. Meanwhile, I SMS a few of my ol' high school friends and told them of this misadventure of mine in Kajang town. What I got were all bunch of "kutukans".
Oh well, next time I'd better visit http://www.wikimapia.com/ or google earth to find this alma mater of mine.
Link - http://www.smapkajang.net/ and http://www.alumni-smapk.com/
KL Midnight Rendezvous
Dataran Merdeka from a very expensive camera meant for would be - professional photographer.
Friday, November 7, 2008
Bukan???
I was trying to focus several times and pay attention as best as I could, but the gravitational factor was very forceful on my eyelids. Alas, it's time the GM said "Anybody has any questions?". Since I initiated the meeting, I felt compelled to ask questions. Just any question.
So I asked him a question. But he misunderstood my question. By then, I was still dizzy. Then, out of nowhere I uttered "Bukan!". Surprisingly, he echoed my word "Bukan???". The others who were paying attention by then, really laughed out loud to this drama. The sound of others laughing made me realized - Oh My God!!!. I had uttered a Malay word to a Korean in a big meeting. Shame on me.
But I was expected to remain calm and trained to be professional at work. To cover up this unwanted drama to persist, I said "Well, at least you get to learn one Malay word for today. It means That's Not What I Meant". And so he smiled. End of drama.
What has gotten into me? This is exactly what happens to people who seldom use English in daily life. The results of not thinking, speaking and using English for a very long time. What a nice plot to make me realize this inadequacy. Very lucky me.
Resolution for the Day - try as much as possible to apply English in daily conversations - be it with friends, colleagues, kids, hubby, etc - which will indirectly force me to think in English. We must think in English in order to speak better English.
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
It's Almost Over
Semalam aku sempat baca Kosmo. Alkisah Abby telah membawa 20 orang wartawan ke lokasi penggambaran Gerak Khas utk bertemu dgn suaminya yg tgh shooting. Sampai situ, dia hulurkan satu borang utk suaminya sign. Biasalah, permohonan utk cerai secara fasakh. Apa itu cerai fasakh?
Cerai Fasakh (source - http://www.wao.org.my/)
You can apply for fasakh (dissolution of marriage by order from the Court) from your State Syariah Court if you can prove either one of these conditions:
1. Your husband has treated you cruelly (e.g. been violent to you either physically or mentally, associated with prostitutes, forced you into immoral behaviour, obstructed your religious obligations, mistreated your property or according to Syariah law treated you unequally compared to his other wife/wives);
2. Your husband has not maintained you for at least three months;
3. Your husband has been sent to prison for three years or more;
4. Your husband has left home and not been contactable for at least one year;
5. Your husband is impotent or has refused sexual intercourse after at least four months of marriage, or for at least one year;
6. Your husband has been insane for at least two years;
7. Your husband is suffering from leprosy, vitilago or a sexually transmitted disease;
8. Your consent to marriage was given by force, mistake or unsound mind; or
9. You have since marriage, has a mental disorder which renders you unfit for marriage.
Tapi kenapa Abby seperti jadik pompuan giler? Kosmo report semalam Abby baru saja melahirkan anak ketiga sebulan 9 hari yg lepas. Sebab dia sgt stress, dia jadiklah macam tu. Ada orang berkata sinis "Dia tu tgh giler meroyan tu". Apa itu meroyan? Omputeh panggil "Postpartum Depression".
Postpartum Depression (source - http://www.forwoman.gov/)
Depression after childbirth is called postpartum depression. Hormonal changes may trigger symptoms of postpartum depression. When you are pregnant, levels of the female hormones estrogen (ESS-truh-jen) and progesterone (proh-JESS-tur-ohn) increases greatly. In the first 24 hours after childbirth, hormone levels quickly return to normal. Researchers think the big change in hormone levels may lead to depression. This is much like the way smaller hormone changes can affect a woman’s moods before she gets her period.
Certain factors may increase your risk of depression during and after pregnancy:
1. a personal history of depression or another mental illness
2. a family history of depression or another mental illness
3. a lack of support from family and friends
4. anxiety or negative feelings about the pregnancy
5. problems with a previous pregnancy or birth
6. marriage or money problems
7. stressful life events
8. young age
9. substance abuse
Women who are depressed during pregnancy have a greater risk of depression after giving birth.
Tapi semalam, permohonan Abby di mahkamah ditolak kerana kemukakan dokumen yg tidak lengkap. Dia tak bawak segala dokumen yg dulu dia pernah cerai dan rujuk semula dlm masa seminggu tahun 2006. Dia jugak kena korek balik carik sijil nikah yg ori. Dia perlukan kerjasama suaminya utk sediakan semua dokumen tu. Barulah hajat dia akan tercapai.
Tapi apa reaksi Norman? Dia kata "Saya masih sayangkan keluarga saya. Byk hati yg saya perlu jaga". Tapi hati siapa yg dia jaga sesangat tu? Menurut Abby, Norman selalu puji girlfren dia di depan Abby, dgn kata2 seperti "Memey bagus, Memey ini, Memey itu". Eh, pantang orang pompuan tau, suami puji pompuan lain depan isteri. Tambahan lagik kalau girlfren. Jadik, hati siapakah yg Norman jaga sangat2 tu?
Bolehkah rumahtangga mereka diselamatkan? Ini satu ujian yg maha hebat utk kedua-duanya. Byk hikmah dan pengajaran dlm kisah ini. Bottomline, kembali pada agama kita. Apa Islam kata mengenai perkahwinan. Di situ segala persoalan akan terjawab.
Marilah kita doakan mereka kembali bersatu jika tidak mahu arasy bergegar buat kesekian kalinya. AMIN.
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
Fun Time at The Peak
Husna and Huda on the Rodeo Ride. Husna enjoyed it very much, rode it 2 times. Huda was scared to death. Her scared face on the top of the ride revealed - "Oh no! Someone get me down right NOW!". But at least she didn't cry. The other girl in pink pants poured her heart out like crazy.